Handfastings, Love & Life!

Wow, life has been so interesting lately. My perspectives overall are changing, people are coming up to me and asking me to be involved in their wedding or handfastings that are coming up soon. One friend asked me to perform a Handfasting for them. Ally, my old Califunny roommate, explained how I can become ordained online and then they send a certificate in the mail that says you are legally allowed to marry people. So that is my current investigation going on in life right now. How mind blowing is that though, that one can become ordained online!?

I’m so excited to plan this Handfasting and meet with the couple to make sure all of their wishes are being incorporated in how they would like the ceremony done.

Recently, I also learned of Sandra and Frank’s engagement and they asked Ally and I to perform the ceremony for them in California in August. I believe Ally will be the Priestess that conducts the exchanging of the traditional vows, while I am the Priestess that will help with the Wiccan traditions beforehand. I’ve done this before for Ally’s wedding almost three years ago. I had a lot of fun in that sacred role. It had been an honor to be asked to do that for her and it is again an honor to have the opportunity to do this for Sandra and Frank.

Then a close friend of mine in Denver, Mya asked me to help her with the reception party favors. We went up to my old hometown up in the mountains to Kittredge, Colorado and gathered smooth river rocks. She wants me to paint a foundation on the rocks a semi-glossy charcoal color and then hand them over to another friend where that person will paint the calligraphy of “I Love You” in another language. Although, the role is a humble one, I am genuinely excited to participate and do this for her. I will breathe love into each and every rock I paint blessing them all!

My own dating life has been just interesting. I’ve dated Ms. Elusive, Ms. In-A-Hurry, Ms. OCD, Ms. Self-Identity Crisis and Ms. Will You Move To Another State & Give Up Everything You Worked For? Anyone want to take a wild guess why none of them escalated into anything more than a few dates? It’s been quite a ride! I’ve learned more about myself and the kind of desires I’d like in a future mate. For having that dawning of recognition, I’m grateful to each and every one of those dates. I have a theory that life is full of frogs and I’ll keep on kissing frogs until one finally transforms. Sometimes I get depressed about it but for the most part I figure life is short, hop on one and ride! I have to keep my sense of humor here or I’d just go nuts. Riiiiibbbiiiit!

The Yahoo Personals has been an interesting experience in itself. I don’t expect to meet Ms. Right from the internet but if there's another frog to go out and have fun with for a while that's fine with me. Even a new friend is welcome too. I believe the Goddess already has someone very much in mind for me but it’s just a matter of timing and building to get to that point. If I’ve waited this long, then surely I can muster up the patience to wait a while longer? Sometimes I wonder….are we really all destined to meet and be with one person for life? What if some of us are fated to a series of frogs? It’s a fleeing thought and has no permanent residence in my idealistic romantic heart but I do ponder it. Que Sera, Sera eh?

I will become the Secretary of Mile High Rainbow Society for the Deaf (MHRSD) here in Colorado. They are working on making me the elected official for that position right now. I look forward to the adventure of learning all that comes with that commitment. Recently was photographed receiving the grant check from Sam’s Club for RMDS where I work. I think RMDS just may humiliate me further and mount the thing on the wall with the picture of me shaking the managers’ hand. We’ll see. School is underway again and I’m looking forward to learning everything I can from my classes and hopefully getting all A’s again by the end of the semester. I will work hard and give it my all to earn those kind of marks again.

I've been presented more opportunities to substitute teach. While I love the experience and the rewarding feeling at the end of the day, I'm investigating into what it takes to acquire a substitute teaching certificate. Once I've taken the neccessary steps in accumulating one, I will be paid more for having that certificate behind me. I am also busy trying to process two different applications for two summer job potentials. One is called the Aspen Center for Austim located in South Denver and the other is a day camp for disability kids called Camp Paha in Lakewood. I'm starting to feel pulled in many ways and wishing there was a way I could manifest two of me to get everything I need done! Phew!

Was in the hospital for 14 long hours last week for Asthma. My body having been weak because I had been fighting off a cold, started a new diet and received my moonflow all within a few days of each other. I am healing nicely though and back on my feet already. I notice that each and every time I have to go to the hospital the Goddess comes in at some point, picks me up and shakes me free of all mental, spiritual, emotional and physical stagnant clutter that has prevented me from growing and sets me down again. Revived and renewed, I’m ready to tackle the world once again. I feel lighter in my footsteps, in my thoughts, and in my heart.

Thank you Goddess and Blessed be!

Just a poem I found that I wrote about someone I had dated for a while and it didn't work out. Poetry is often what I turn to in order to let go and create anew.

Elusive Lover & The Goddess

Cannot catch you, elusive lover
But I can feel you

See my fire burning bright
But you remain detached

Our connection, sacred and profound
Tells of no lies, only of truths abound

So run all you want, but you won’t get far
I’m a part of you, etched inside your soul

Blindly grope at other connections
But they won’t lift you as high as I can

I’ve stood in the center of the fire
Waiting for you to join

What are you so scared of?
I only reflect what brews inside of you
I simply hold a mirror for you to see
Disbelief keeps you disconnected
So be it.

I must let go of what no longer serves my growth.
But to bring myself to cut the ties that bind…
Makes me fall to my knees and whisper,
“Ok, Goddess, this is in your hands now”

Releasing you, a part of me comes undone
Alone now, creation to be birthed anew

Nurturance of new connections
A faint dream opening me to other possibilities
Awkwardly I begin to stumble forward
And plunge into the whirlwind abyss

Where will I end up?
Who will I meet?
What will become of me?
And how will I know I’ve landed?

A gentle whisper answers,
My child, close your eyes and trust me
I have seen you through countless of times.
Learn to breathe, learn to let go, learn to be.
I know of your dreams and I know of your
hungers. You must learn of how to surrender.
Surrender to me and surrender to yourself
but surrender sweet child of mine, surrender.

Your loneliness is an illusion, for I have been with
you since the beginning of time and I am what
sustains you when all else falls away.

I am in the beatings of your heart
I am in the rise and fall of each breath you take
I am in the eyes that gaze back at you in the mirror
I am in and of your heartache, fears and tears
I am in the laughter you release
I am in the roots that keep you grounded
I am in and of the wings that make your goals take flight

But most importantly Daughter, not only am I in you,
I am you.